Diaries .................Friday 11/6/2010

Woke up in the morning , hmmm , feeling missing him terribly .. called but no answer , sent a msg , he answered finally , i said : wanna tell you somthin important but in a message .. i hanged up and sent a msg ( just wanna say i miss you and i love you ).. he didn't answer , i waited , still no answer ..and i thought to myself , how the hell guys don't get our unexpected , non-occasional messages? they are our most important messages bdw , it's when we are in our emotional peak morons .. anyway , i left my bed and went to my mirror ( when we are exposed to an emotional block we head to our sincere freind , the mirror , to see just in case somethin wrong about our faces or figures ,,,,hmmm , my hair grew longer , i like long hair in gurlz , it's more feminine . when i was a little gurl , mom used to cut my hair , makes it short just to release herself from combing it , although my hair is soft , i would never do this to my daughter , i ll let her hair grow taller and taller till she says please enough mom .. my complexes grow bigger this morning .. mom used to tell me ( the gurl is three things : figure, skin and hair ).. oh God it's like a constant competition, we are competing all the time with any new wave comes into this world ... in yesteryears it was full women and curvey features and all the time we had to fill this part and curve this side to appeal .. nowadays it's the skinny era and the Zero f... size that we have all the time try to reach even near it , so we are constantly on edge . long straight hair , then wavy short hair , then brunettes styles ,,, no no blond styles are the rage ........... then be heppy and casual ,, then no no you gotta be a lady style , classic yet modern ... then flat shoes , no make it high heeled shoes .. tanned skin , no we changed the wave , make it fair ..................... oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh just SHUT THE HELL UP we wanna be ourselves , ourselves , why can't you morons just accept us for what we are ? i mean , we accept the world for all it's holes and Ozon mess ups and water dryings and accelerated heat , i mean there's no perfect world so why we gotta be perfect? we just wanna be normal and natural and simple .
Yesterday i was watching an old arabic movie , it's titled ( i love this one . but i want this one),, and i thought to myself , and why don't you love and want just One? her problem in the movie, was that she loves a guy but her mind is against him and thinks of another one , and i thought to myself , this is not love , cos simply when you love you just want , you can't imagine yourself with another person , so actualy she wasn't in love and the right title should be (i LIKE this one but i want that one) and in this case i'll tell her , go to the one you want since likeness is not a strong reason to stick up to a person , but LOVE is one hell of a strong reason to cling up to, anyway in the end of the movie she went to the guy she supposed to be in love with ,typical . the day is still young and i hope it will end up in a better way ...updates will be on ..